Yesterday is Gone

In a fit of nostalgia, I did something I probably shouldn’t have. I started clicking back through my Facebook photos. I didn’t have to go far before the memories came flooding in. How can something feel like it just happened, but though it never happened at all? What an uncomfortable, and yet irresistible, feeling!

Nostalgia: “A wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in one’s life, to one’s home or homeland, or to one’s family and friends; a sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time.

I almost feel like my body can’t catch up to all that’s happened over the past year, but when does it all end? It feels like I’m trying to hold onto water as it slips through my fingertips! It’s maddening, but so exciting. Terrifying, but I can’t wait to see what’s next. Can anyone relate?

I guess all I can do is run! Because life is going so fast; I can’t afford to sit and wait. I’ve heard enough older folks say, “It seems like only yesterday,” and now I realize how true the statement is. Life is but a vapor; here one second, then gone the next.

I remember Leo’s first breaths, now he’s learning to talk, and is laughing and interacting with me. We lay on the floor together and he likes to touch my nose and mouth and make babbling noises at me while I talk to him.

I guess that’s why Paul says he runs the race as though to win a prize, and he beats his body to make it his slave. If we don’t, we’re bound to be ineffective. I don’t want to meet the King as a couch potato! I want to meet him mid-stride; to be leaping a hurdle in pursuit of His commission.

And yet, I’m reminded that often we’re in a place for a reason, and CONTENT is not the same as COMPLACENT.

So here I am, content to serve where I am, but not complacent to stay at the same level as I am. Ever moving forward while still in the same place. How’s that for confusing?! Guess that’s what I get for looking at old photos at 11pm, eh?

Nostalgia? I guess when you boil it all down it becomes pretty simple. Yesterday is gone and will never return, today is here and leaving fast, and tomorrow is always right around the corner. What does your tomorrow have in store for you?

Some late night thoughts from a sanctified sinner,
Mark

Leo’s Heart 101

I have compiled a post that I hope can explain how Leo’s heart works and what will be taking place in the surgery he will be having soon. This is what we’ve learned about his heart defects so far, but I’m sure we’ll learn even more in the next couple of months!

What is CCTGA? The best explanation I found is from a friend’s blog:

Congenitally corrected transposition of the great arteries (CCTGA), also known as levo-Transposition of the Great Arteries (l-TGA) is when “the blood from the right atrium flows into a left ventricle, which then goes into the main pulmonary artery (MPA), through the lungs, to the left atrium, down into a right ventricle, and out to the body. The blood flow through the heart goes to to where it needs to go, but the ventricles are ‘inverted’, which means that structuarally you have the wrong ‘types’ of ventricles doing the wrong type of work. The pressure on the right side of the heart is low, and a normal right ventricle is designed for low pressure work.

Certainly, the inverted left ventricle, as designed for high pressure work, can handle it. However, the right ventricle on the high pressure left side is not architecturally ready for its long term work to pump blood out to the body. Over time, the left-sided morphologic right ventricle gets thicker, as all muscles do when dealing with higher resistance, but it also dilates. WIth further dilation, it leads to a volume load that stretches the tricuspid valve, causing it to leak. As it leaks, it adds more of a volume load onto the ventricle. Also, as the ventricle dilates, it compresses the right-sided left ventricle, which makes it hard for the heart to pump to the lungs as well. All of this leads to congestive heart failure and poor cardiac output to the body.”

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What is a VSD?:

As you can see in the photo above right, a ventricular septal defect (VSD) is a hole in the wall (or septum) that is between the two lower chambers (or ventricles) of the heart. It is also one of the most common heart defects.

“In babies with a ventricular septal defect, blood often flows from the left ventricle through the ventricular septal defect to the right ventricle and into the lungs. This extra blood being pumped into the lungs forces the heart and lungs to work harder. Over time, if not repaired, this defect can increase the risk for other complications, including heart failure, high blood pressure in the lungs (called pulmonary hypertension), irregular heart rhythms (called arrhythmia), or stroke” (CDC).

What is Complete Heart Block?

“There are three types of heart block, depending on the extent of disruption of the electrical impulses: first degree, second degree, and third degree. Also known as complete heart block, third degree is the most severe and represents complete interruption of electrical communication between the atria and ventricles” (CC).

“Complete heart block occurs when the electrical signal can’t pass normally from the atria, the heart’s upper chambers, to the ventricles, or lower chambers” (UCSF).

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Leo’s 1st Surgery:

Leo received his 1st surgery on November 30, 2012, only three days after he was born. This surgery was needed to address his heart block, as his heart rate dropped to around 50 bpm. The cardiac surgeon gave Leo a pacemaker, but also put a band around his pulmonary artery to help with the pressures in his heart.

What is an Epicardial Dual-Chamber Pacemaker?

“A pacemaker is a small device that’s placed in the chest or abdomen to help control abnormal heart rhythms. This device uses electrical pulses to prompt the heart to beat at a normal rate” (NHLBI).

An epicardial pacemaker lead is stitched to the outside of the heart muscle, versus an endocardial or transvenous pacemaker in which the leads/wires are inserted through the veins.

A dual chamber pacemaker has 1 lead in the atria (top chamber) and 1 lead in the ventricle (bottom chamber).

“The pacemaker has two parts: the leads and a pulse generator. The pulse generator houses the battery and a tiny computer, and resides just under the skin of the chest. The leads are wires that are threaded through the veins [or on the outside of the heart] into the heart and implanted into the heart muscle. They send impulses from the pulse generator to the heart muscle, as well as sense the heart’s electrical activity” (WMD).

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Screen shot 2013-06-08 at 8.13.31 AMWhat is a Pulmonary Artery Band (PA Band)?:

The PA band is a constrictive band placed around the pulmonary artery. It reduces the diameter of the pulmonary artery thus restricting the amount of blood pumped into the lungs.

It also prepares and trains the left ventricle for patients with CCTGA who are needing the Double Switch Procedure in the future, by “creating a greater pressure load nearing that of systemic pressure to the naïve LV” (CDN).

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Leo’s 2nd Surgery:

Sometime this August, Leo will be having open heart surgery to have several cardiac procedures done. First, the surgeons will remove the PA band. Then he’ll have to close the VSDs. Next they’ll switch the great arteries (aorta and pulmonary artery) to the respective ventricles (arterial switch). Lastly, they redirect the pure and impure blood to the respective normal ventricles by creating a baffle/tunnel (atrial switch or the Mustard procedure).

What happens during a VSD closure?:

“Closing a large VSD by open-heart surgery usually is done in infancy or childhood even in patients with few symptoms, to prevent complications later. Usually a patch of fabric or pericardium (the normal lining around the outside of the heart) is sewn over the VSD to close it completely. Later this patch is covered by the normal heart lining tissue and becomes a permanent part of the heart” (H).

What is the Double Switch Procedure?:

Is an arterial and atrial switch. Here’s a diagram of what happens during the arterial switch:

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The atrial “switch”, or Mustard procedure, “employs a baffle [or a tunnel] to direct oxygenated pulmonary venous return into the right atrium and thence into the right ventricle which is the pumping ventricle for the aorta and the systemic circulation”.

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“It is an extensive surgery within the atria to create the baffles, which leads to lots of scarring. These scars set up the heart for dysfunction of the sinus node, as well as other tachyarrhythmia (abnormal fast heart beats), such as atrial flutter and fibrillation. The scarring can also lead to obstruction of inflow from the systemic or pulmonary veins. Long term outcome is unknown as the double switch has not been performed consistently well until the 1990s, meaining that good long-term follow-up data is not abundant” (Abi).

So there you have it! That’s just a little glimpse of what is going on inside of Leo’s little heart. Hoping that this will help you know how to pray for the upcoming surgery. It’s pretty complicated, and there are lots of statistics and research papers on the outcome of this surgery, but we know that we can place our fears and anxieties in the One who knows how it will turn out.

If You Had Not Come…

[You can also read May's Newsletter here]

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This past month a missionary in PNG was teaching a lesson on Jonah, and noticed that one of the tribal men began to cry. The man said, “I was overwhelmed, thinking that now as an old man I am able to hear this wonderful truth after believing lies for so many years; and I cried because if you missionaries had not come I still would not have heard. So I am so thankful that you have come,” he replied.

For most of these unreached people groups, the gospel has taken several thousand years to finally reach them! Can you imagine knowing that generations and generations of your family members had no opportunity to hear the Truth of God’s Word? Christ died on the cross over 2,000 years ago, yet there are millions that still haven’t heard the gospel! Isn’t this an unfair tragedy?

We’ve been really encouraged lately from reading about other tribal people groups, once unreached, going and taking the Word of God to other villages and language groups. Be in prayer for the Higaunon in the Philippines, the Dinangat and the Siar in Papua New Guinea, and other new churches whose desire is to make the name of our Lord known!

Please consider joining our team, to share the good news of Jesus Christ with those who are still waiting.

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What we’ve been up to this month:

  • Leo had an appointment at Sick Kids in Toronto. You can read about it here.
  • We moved to an apartment building in town! Our mailing address is still PO Box 707, Durham, ON N0G 1R0, Canada.
  • Had a Skype interview with the field leadership in “Indo” (aka, Asia-Pacific). We will be contacting them again in October to give an update on Leo’s status.
  • A church has offered to pay off the remainder of our Sick Kids bill! Praise the Lord for our generous brothers and sisters in Christ!
  • Mark’s internship at the MTC ended this past week.

Please pray with us:

  • We are now in full-time Ministry Partnership Development, looking to build a team of prayer and financial partners before we can consider coming on staff at NTM Canada while we wait for Leo to recover from surgery.
  • For Mark as he helps the MTC students during Jungle Camp building, and as he goes on a 3 day canoe trip with them.
  • Mark will be having another colonoscopy onJune 17th.
  • Leo is having a heart cath on July 25th, and heart surgery possibly in August.
  • For Mark as he disciples a group of young men in town.
  • That we would have a Christ-like testimony in the presence of our neighbors and landlord.

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Thank you for praying with us!

Till Every Tribe is Reached,

Mark, Lauren, & Leo

Why Do Bad Things Happen? Pt. 1

I’m not one to cry. I’ve always been pretty reserved, and only have cried in a few movies throughout my life (Little Women and Anne of Green Gables come to mind haha). Ever since I’ve been pregnant and had a baby, I’ve noticed that pretty much anything can bring me to tears! Like reading a newspaper article about a baby stuck in a pipe in China or watching a funeral for those who past away at the explosion in West. I guess God decided to make us become more compassionate and tender-hearted when we become parents, which is probably a good thing!

My heart breaks for so many people; people going through times unimaginable. My mind wonders to what God is thinking!

Why would God allow beautiful little babies to die from heart defects and make parents go coffin shopping? Why would He let a tornado take away children from their mommas? I suppose the ultimate question everyone asks is, Why does God let these bad things happen? Why doesn’t he let all of these babies and kids have long and “normal” lives?

God’s Word has an answer. It always does!

Why do bad things happen? Because of what happened back in the garden of Eden. On the sixth day of creation, God made Adam and Eve, and they had a perfect relationship with God. To give them free will, He told them, “You may freely eat the fruit of every tree in the garden—except the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. If you eat its fruit, you are sure to die (Gen. 2:16,17).

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As we all know, Satan tempted Adam and Eve, and they sinned by choosing to eat the fruit that they knew beforehand would bring death (God is a communicator!). Not only did temporal death enter the world through that one action, but so did an eternal life away from God for those who did not trust in His prophecy of a coming Messiah.

God Rewards Adam and Eve's Suffering

Romans 5:12 says, “When Adam sinned, sin entered the world. Adam’s sin brought death, so death spread to everyone, for everyone sinned.” This is also known as original sin, and it is the reason why every man, woman, girl, and boy are born sinners and born without a reconciled relationship to God.

Bad things happen because sin has entered this world!

Romans 6:23 tells us, “For the wages of sin is death. God doesn’t bring death. Sin brings death, and doesn’t care how old you are. Even in our sin and death, God still desires that we have life! This is why He sent His Son as the perfect substitute for our sins; so that we can have life not only on this earth, but also eternal life without tears and suffering on the new earth to come.

“…That through death He [Christ] might destroy the one who has the power of death, that is, the devil.” Hebrews 2:14

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.” Revelation 21:4

So when you think about the age-old question, “Why do bad things happen to good people?” We can remember that it’s not God’s fault, nor was it His plan (though He did have a plan for redeeming us). Bad things happen because we are unholy sinners living in a sin-filled and Satan-ruled world. 

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God is loving and merciful despite our temporal circumstances, whether that be someone dying, losing a job, or a relationship destroyed. God has never forsaken us, His children, and for us there is always joy and peace to be had.

To be continued.

One Third Who I Was

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Most of my young guy friends would say,“What are you some kind of girl or something,” if they heard me say how my heart leaps when I think of and see my son and wife. It’s a feeling of excitement, fear, tiredness, love, joy, jealousy-that-I’m-not-with-them, etc., all at once, and it’s made me finally understand why people say, “You don’t truly understand love until you’ve had a child.”

The sudden outburst of emotions that make me want to cry and laugh when I think about him. The sick feeling when he’s crying and I can’t help him. The excitement I feel when I’m coming home and get to play with him. The countless times I’ve been late to appointments because I get lost just playing with him.

After “batchin’ it” while Lauren and Leo were visiting family and friends in Texas [in April], I was left feeling confused. As with being a husband, so brings fatherhood a new me. I don’t think I’m the same person I was six months ago. I’m less of a man than I was, like a part of me is now contained in this fragile little form that is Leo.

When we first planned this trip for Lauren and Leo, I was excited cause I thought it would be a good chance to get some rest and get caught up on some work I needed to do. To the contrary, I found myself feeling lost, split, or not whole. Okay, so I don’t really know WHAT I felt, but it was uncomfortable and I was relieved when it was over.

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As much as I enjoyed the quiet and freedom, I found I didn’t sleep as fully, cook as healthily, or laugh like I do when they’re around. This has lead me to a thought, “How did Jesus feel being separated from God?”

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What agony must have been felt when He was on the cross and had the weight of my sin put on him. Though being absent from my wife and son for two weeks is nothing in comparison what Christ endured, I think I’m a little bit closer to understanding those drops of blood and sweat that He shed in the garden, just from thinking about the trial that was coming up.

So all this to say as I’m getting older, I’m realizing that the most precious thing I have on this earth is my family, not only those by blood, but those by the Spirit.

To my brothers and sisters in Christ I miss you, love you, and can’t wait to spend eternity with you in heaven. Amen?

Just some thoughts from a sanctified sinner,

Mark